If any of you use satellites or the internet or whatever to read or watch the international news, you may be hearing my name pop up in the near future. You may even hear my name pop up in some debates, and people may be making some claims and bandying about certain buzzwords. But before this happens, I just want to set the record straight.
During my time in Morocco, I’ve had an extremely enjoyable time. I’ve also occasionally found myself in, shall we say, situations that are less than optimum, from a moral standpoint. Sure, I’ve done some perhaps inappropriate things, haven’t we all? I mean, I started a forest fire. I sucker punched an agent from the treasury department. I misrepresented the weight of livestock. I attended opening night of an art gallery nude. I sold fraudulent earthquake insurance. I passed dozens of bad checks. I fixed a cock fight. I befouled a dumpster near Florence Square. I appeared in an indecent video recorded on a cell phone. I roasted a peacock at an outdoor Barbecue and told people it was chicken. I caused an all-you-can-eat seafood buffet to go out of business. I taught children dirty words in english. I racketeered. I produced a short-lived bi-monthly publication that gave lawn care advice that was, at best, questionable. I threw a pimp off of a blacony.
But I want one thing to be absolutely clear: I had nothing whatsoever to do with creating an insanitary condition at the petting zoo.