Maryland

I’ve moved to Maryland! People keep asking me what it’s like here. Let me tell you a story: Comcast was supposed to come install my internet and cable, and no one showed up. I called the 1-800 number, and they said they had no record of an appointment being set up, though they do have a record of their representative calling last week to confirm the address. Anyway, I ended up driving to Rockville to pick up the modem and cable box and do it my own damn self.

I go to the apartment office and ask how to get to Rockville. “I don’t know how to get there,” says the man behind the desk, “From here.” I start to leave, but that “from here” bothers me. “Where would you have to be to get to Rockville?” I ask. “Gaithersburg.” He says. Gaithersburg is the next town down the road, so, praying that my instincts are wrong, I ask “Do you know how to get to Gaithersburg from here?”

He says “yes.”

I ask “So you can get to Rockville from Gaitherburg, and from here to Gaithersburg, but not from here to Rockville?” He refuses to answer, just gives me the sullen hairy eyeball when I ask him the same question three times in a row.

Yeah, that’s how my time in Maryland is going so far.

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